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The Paranoid Android
...musings of a mechanically depressed robot...
Complete madness at the droid's abode.
After a particularly shyte week at work the promise of a couple pints of "best" at a local watering house with my wife seemed like heaven. We decided on the Flying Horse and was not disappointed. A few pints of Green King IPA later, plus a quick glass of Irish we headed off in search of food.

Misty had a craving for Wagamama's where as I didn't. I didn't really have a craving at all. We wandered around for about an hour, maybe more before Misty's need to spend a penny brought us back to Liverpool Street station. Spending a penny now costs 20p... that's inflation for you! I suggested going home and eating there - which was not received particularly well. Misty spoke to strangers in the WC and didn't speak to me all the way home.

I prepared dinner (a mixture of reheating the previous nights leftovers and chopping salad) and Misty started speaking to me again.

Saturday was hair-cut day. Misty had an appointment and mine needed cutting quite badly. Misty had finally decided not to buy any more cats as our current two seem to hate each other just as much as when they were first introduced. Adding more would seem to be folly. A conversation on the way to the hairdressers went something like this:

"I am not going to get another kitten." ..pause.. "unless there is a black one or a Calico there today"

Misty disappears into the hairdressers and I wander over the hill to the barbers. In the barbers the lass who normally cuts my hair is absent. In her place are two young girls. There is no-one else in the shop so I get may hair cut straight away. The girl cutting my hair is very friendly and chatty. she tells me her sister is getting wed the following day. She tells me about her sister's young child who is from a previous relationship and how there is a certain amount of in-fighting among her family. She tells me about her outfit for the event, a basque-type top and skirt combo. She tells me it was a little tight so she should have lost a few pounds by now. She tells me not to worry (!) - she has a plan. She'll buy a bunch of Senapod and have a damn good crap in the morning.

I'm not sure I'd have a conversation like that with my best friends... but it seemed perfectly natural for her to tell me, a complete stranger.

I got back to Misty's hairdressers and she still hadn't been seen. I have no idea why they bother with appointments. I agree to go to the pet shop and get some fish food and see if they have kittens in. I tell her I'll get a coffee and sit in the café at the end of the street.

In the pet shop I see that they do have kittens in... a black one and a Calico. Oh-Dear. I get the fish food and go to the café.

Misty finally gets her hair done and meets me at the café. She asks about the kittens. I say there was kittens in the shop. She asks if they are for sale. I reply I didn't find out. She decides a visit to the pet shop is required. Oh-Dear-Oh-Dear-Oh-Dear.

We are now the proud owners of 4 cats... Scarlet and Max joining Sam and Twinks. I must be mad.

After we got them home and introduced them to a now pissed off Sam and Twinks we set them up in the spare room with a litter tray and food and water so we can keep them separate from the other two. I think Twinks wouldn't think twice about eating one of them... and Sam didn't look too pleased to see them either.

We visited the parental abode and gave them news. They thought we was mad too! It wont stop Dad and Bianca from coming over to play with them!

The rest of Saturday was spent with the kittens. They are funny buggers... completely graceless.

Sunday was chore day. I started on the front garden - cut the grass and weeded the beds. I managed just over a half of the weeding before I gave up for the day. I wasn't sure what the hell was weed and what was plant... I guess we may loose a couple plants that look weed-like! I also planted one of the rose bushes from the mad purchase of plants month. Pictures will follow if I ever finish it!

After the back breaking garden I started on the back breaking ironing. I managed to do all of Misty's stuff... most of my shirts and T-shirts before I gave up on that too...

We watched Dr Who last night. We always manage to miss it on Saturdays. I'm so glad they repeat it. After Dr Who, the Who documentary and Farscape my appetite for Sci-Fi was sated. Flicking through the channels we spotted the "greatest 100 albums" on 4. Trying to guess the greatest ever album was hard. I was please to see so many good albums in the top 50. I noted the lack of "boy"/"girl" bands and modern "Divas" and it gave me a warm feeling inside... or was that Max peeing on my trousers?

The number one album of all time was a bit of a surprise. So much so I had to steal Misty's iPod this morning to listen to it on the way to work.

Now the weekend is over and it's back to the usual grind. Dave is working from home today so I have a list as long as my arm to complete with instructions to call for more when I've finished. Got to give him his due - I'm never bored when he's not about!

Time to get a spot of lunch and get back to my "to-do" list.

Current Mood: sore sore
Current Music: Misty's iPod

18 comments or Leave a comment
scarletdemon From: scarletdemon Date: April 18th, 2005 11:26 am (UTC) (Link)
Yay! Good name choice! :)

I went to Wagamamma's in Brighton, in March, a sort of lunchtime treat for my birthday. Goodness, we know how to celebrate don't we? Dave thought it would be fun as they had just opened here.

As for your hairdresser...I'd be exactly the same as her and may I say how WELL you listened! Most men just switch off. ;)
paranoidandroid From: paranoidandroid Date: April 18th, 2005 12:19 pm (UTC) (Link)
Misty is responsible for the name... she's wanted to get a cat so she can call it Scarlet for a while now.

I listen to everyone - I just have this fantastic ability to forget almost everything within a couple of days. Next month when I return I will have no recollection of her conversation... which might or might not be a good thing.
tweezlebum From: tweezlebum Date: April 18th, 2005 01:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
I didn't want to get a cat so I can call it Scarlet. I wanted a cat whose name was Scarlet. It's harder to find a cat who fits a name than to find a name that fits a cat. :P

And I'm sure it will thrill you to know that I named her after a Tori song that I listened to over & over on the train the day Jasper died. :)
teya_uk From: teya_uk Date: April 18th, 2005 11:45 am (UTC) (Link)
I'm glad you didn't actually say what the number 1 album was .. I've recorded the last hour of that programme and not seen it yet
paranoidandroid From: paranoidandroid Date: April 18th, 2005 12:17 pm (UTC) (Link)
I recorded it for Misty as well... so I didn't want to spoil it for her.
brightspot From: brightspot Date: April 18th, 2005 12:46 pm (UTC) (Link)
We both got new black kittens this weekend!!!!!!!! Ours is named Nicodemus the 8th (every black cat Chris has ever had has been Nicodemus), but we call him Nico for short. He is *so cute*!!!!!!!!!!!!! He needs a little friend, tho, so I am on the prowl for kittens myself. I REALLY want a Calico to name Brightspot (see: "Uhura's Song" for reference), but a sweet orange tabby or orange and white spotted would do just as well.

We went to the most BEAUTIFUL cat shelter called Cat Welfare...only the sick cats and kittens were in cages (and the cages were HUGE and had lots of cushions and toys and climbing things) - all the healthy ones were running about loose, playing, laying in the sun, wrestling or climbing the wall sized scratching posts. They were all so amazing! But Nico stole my heart when he meowed like a baby, crying, then nestled himself into my chin and fell asleep.

So...I want to know what the number one album is, although I doubt I'll agree with their decision. Will you post it after Misty's seen the program???
paranoidandroid From: paranoidandroid Date: April 18th, 2005 02:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
Nicodemus VIII... that is a fantastic name! Our little black one's full name is Maximus Decimus Meridius... but we will only ever call him Max ;)

wossisname From: wossisname Date: April 18th, 2005 04:26 pm (UTC) (Link)


As I didn't see the programme or tape it, when the time is right could you let me know what the top album was.
paranoidandroid From: paranoidandroid Date: April 21st, 2005 09:50 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: intrigued

Now that everyone should have seen it... I have the whole count down posted here
xstarkittenx From: xstarkittenx Date: April 18th, 2005 10:51 pm (UTC) (Link)
i hope you didnt *buy* them from a pet shop!???

didnt you go to an animal rescue centre? there are so many kittens who need homes!!

tweezlebum From: tweezlebum Date: April 19th, 2005 12:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
Before I bought Jasper & Sam, and after Jasper died, I phoned every animal shelter or rescue centre I could find locally and not one single person has EVER phoned me back. I got tired of getting the third degree from people who can't be arsed to phone me back, and I got tired of getting my hopes up every time I heard/read about cats that needed homes.

And although I did buy four cats from a pet shop, I suspect that many cats who end up in shelters also came from pet shops, so I figure that by giving them a good, stable, permanent home with guaranteed food, love, and vet care in the first place, I'm helping too. My pet-shop cats will never end up in a shelter.
xstarkittenx From: xstarkittenx Date: April 20th, 2005 01:54 am (UTC) (Link)
or they were kittens from pet shop cats..

i dont think you would abandon your kittens! they are so so so so cute!!!!!!! i want them!

tweezlebum From: tweezlebum Date: April 20th, 2005 06:53 am (UTC) (Link)
Yup, or that as well. Which is why I have mine neutered as soon as the vets will do it and before they start making babies. And also because horny cats are really unsettling. ;)
nuala From: nuala Date: April 20th, 2005 02:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
I still have Dr Who, episode 2 on tape for you. I noticed that the Sunday episode of Farscape is different from Saturday's. Just fyi. And, of course, Andrew and I went straight to the computer and purchased that particular album as well. :D
paranoidandroid From: paranoidandroid Date: April 21st, 2005 09:51 am (UTC) (Link)
Shiiiiiiiiiit! - I've been missing every other Farscape cos I thought it was a repeat of the night befores?

nuala From: nuala Date: April 21st, 2005 12:24 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, ditto here. Just caught it by chance on Sunday, noticed that the listing descrip was different, and lo, it was a new episode. I didn't record it, sorry.
paranoidandroid From: paranoidandroid Date: April 21st, 2005 01:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
No video?!? Some friend you turned out to be! :p
nuala From: nuala Date: April 21st, 2005 01:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
Like you can't download them. ;-)
18 comments or Leave a comment