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Crass Mailing - The Paranoid Android
...musings of a mechanically depressed robot...
paranoidandroid
paranoidandroid
Crass Mailing
You just gotta love junk mail. You've really gotta love email scams. I've just recieved about a dozen copies of the following mail - 1 to each address I have @android.org.uk.




FROM BARR PHILIP FADAYA
TEL NO 228-9493924
LOME-TOGO.


Attention:Android

I am contacting you for the claim of your late uncle fund that
was deposited with the union togolaise bank.I must solicit your
confidence in this claim,this is by virtue of its nature as being
utterly confidential and top Secret.Though I know that contact of
this magnitude will make any one apprehensive and worried,but I
am assuring you that all will be well since i know everything
about your late uncle fund.

I have decided to contact you due to the urgency of this
matter.Let me start by introducing myself properly to you.I am
BARRISTER PHILIP FADAYA the Attorney to your late uncle Engr.J.C
Android(Snr)an oil Merchant with the Federal Government of
lome-togo,until his death some years ago in Kenya Air Bus
(A310-300)Flight KQ430,Banked with UNION BANK PLC,lome-togo and
had a closing balance as at the end of September,2001 worth
S$48,000,000.00( fourty eight Million United States Dollars).The
bank now expects the Next of Kin to come forward as
beneficiary.Efforts have been made by the Union togolaise Bank of
lome-togo to get in touch with any of the Deceased Family or
Relatives,but they have met with no success.As the deceased being
a foreigner,that was why i decided to contact you so that you can
put claim on this.

Now the management under the influence of the bank Chairman and
Members of the Board of directors,that arrangement has been made
for the fund to be declared Unclaimed

In order to avert this negative development, it is my duty to
contact you since your name was listed as the next of kin to his
properties.

All documents and proof to enable you get this fund will be
carefully worked out by me for this claim.I have secured from the
probate an order of Mandamus to locate any of the deceased
beneficiaries,and more so i am assuring you that this claim is
100% risk free.Now it is left for you deceide on what nyou will
give as my percentage for assisting you in this claim.

I hope to hear from you soon or call me immediately you receive
this mail on this phone no 228-9493924 or 9193226.

Yours Sincerely,

BARRISTER PHILIP FADAYA

ALTERNATIVE email:okokonduke2@zwallet.com

--
Ziskejte kvalitu, kterou si zasluhujete. Za minimalni mesicni
poplatek vam nabizime Antivir, Antispam nebo dalsi kapacitu pro
vas Mailbox. Vice na: http://sluzby.volny.cz/product/postpaid/


I have no idea what that says at the bottom but I can only guess it's some kind of advertising, so this powerful "barrister" type is using free webmail of some sort.



It amuses me no end that I'm supposed to fall for this crap and end up handing over hard earned cash because I am a greedy, but ultimately stupid SOB.

It also amuses me that they didn't bother to check the validity of the surname. I seriously doubt ANYONE has a surname of Android.

Current Mood: amused amused

3 comments or Leave a comment
Comments
tweezlebum From: tweezlebum Date: August 4th, 2003 07:47 am (UTC) (Link)
How much is "fourty?"
From: (Anonymous) Date: August 1st, 2004 11:43 am (UTC) (Link)
we get the same from him in holland
just for the fun of it, I replied and called him up on the mentioned phone number.
he answers the phone by the same name. and seems to know all about me.

he asked me for my telephone number and fax number, I send him an e-mail with just that.

I got the following letter back:

"Reference to our telephone discussion today,i want to thanks you for your concerned in actualisation of this inheritance claim with the bank and also for your immediate response and i appreciate your good understand to this and also the confident which you have given to me.I am impress to transact this business with you and with a good faith and the love of God.In other fasting this claim,You have to send this prepared application text to the bank email
address: bankdirectors@financier.com

You have to re-type this application text in your letter head paper or an ordinary paper sheet inscribing all your private contacts both telephone and fax numbers for easy acknowledgement of your application as the next of kin to the deceased.Note that you should be responding to me through this email address.

I want you to send this application text to the bank immediately and inform me as well.Also endeavour to call me on my private telephone number:+228-9193226.

A soon as the bank receives your application,they will acknowledge it.I shall give you further directives in this transaction as we proceed.I would want us to have an oral introduction before the full commencement of this transaction.I will also need your private telephone to contact you at urgent needs.

THE PREPARED APPLICATION TEXT :

ATTN: DR.GIDO USMAN
THE DIRECTOR FOREIGN OPERATIONS.
FOREIGN DEPOSIT DEPARTMENT
MERCURY TRUST BANK(M.T.B.)SARL.LOME TOGO
DEAR SIR,

RE:APPLICATION FOR THE CLAIM OF DEPOSITED FUND
WITH YOUR SECURITY BANK.VAULT
A/C#N0:14-2552004/BIA/tg.VALUED AT USD $48 MILLION
UNITED STATES DOLLARS ONLY.

SIR,PLEASE BE INFORMED THAT I WISH TO ASK FOR THE
CLAIM,OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED DEPOSIT WITH YOUR
BANK.THE ABOVE FUND WAS DEPOSITED IN YOUR BANK
BY THE LATE UNCLE.I AM HIS COUSIN AND THE NAMED NEXT
OF KIN TO SO MANY OF OUR FAMILY MONETARY TRANSACTIONS
WITH ALL DOCUMENTS OF PROOF.INCLUDING THIS
FUND.

I WISH AS THE HEIR APPERENT TO THIS DEPOSIT TO COME
FOR THE CLAIMS AS INDICATED ABOVE.I SHALL ABIDE BY ALL
REGULATIONS TO THIS IMPENDING FUND AS ENSHRINED
ON THE CONTENT OF DEPOSIT AGREEMENT WITH YOUR
BANK.WITH ALL LEGAL RIGHTS OF CLAIM. PLEASE ACCEPT
THIS LATE APPLICATION AS IT WAS DUE TO SOME FAMILY
LOGISTIC PROBLEMS CONSEQUENT UPON THE PRESENT
SITUATION.I HOPE YOU WILL UNDERSTAND AND EXPEDITE
ACTIONS LIABLE TO THIS DEPOSIT IMMEDIATELY ON THE
RECEIPT OF THIS APPLICATION.

I WILL BE OF FURTHER CONCERN UPON DEMANDS OF ANY
DOCUMENTS AS MAY BE NEEDED BY YOUR OFFICE.I BEG FOR
YOUR WONDERFUL CO-OPERATION IN FACILITATING THE
PROCESS OF MY REQUEST IN THE EARLIEST POSSIBLE TIME.I
WILL ALSO NEED YOUR ASSISTANCE IN NOMINATING AN ECOWAS
BANKERS ATTORNEY WHO WILL FOLLOW UP DOCUMENTATIONS AND
UPDATING OF OUR FILES FOR THE RELEASE OF THIS FUNDS.I
AWAIT YOUR IMMEDIATE CONFIRMATION AND URGENT RESPONSE
URGENTLY.

YOURS FAITHFULLY
your name,telephone fax numbers
and email address.

I will be expecting your immediate response as soon as
possible.
Best regards
Fadaya
alucardromero From: alucardromero Date: January 24th, 2005 08:29 pm (UTC) (Link)

Email Scam

I have one just like that.
3 comments or Leave a comment