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Corduroy Bear's trip to Wales. - The Paranoid Android
...musings of a mechanically depressed robot...
paranoidandroid
paranoidandroid
Corduroy Bear's trip to Wales.
Yesterday was a bit too busy to write, so I'm a day late with news of the "Welsh Trip".

Let's start on Friday. Friday was a busy day, lunch time was spent in Magnets deciding what our kitchen will look like in 3 months time. Let me just say "Groovy". Remember that word - I'll be using it a lot!

Friday was also the day I got a mail (at the 'rent house) from Misty's little sister. It read a bit like this:
We [Misty's sister et al] have just finished reading some stories about Corduroy Bear. Corduroy is a bear that is bought by a little named Lisa. He goes on some great adventures. He gets lost in the mall looking for a button for his overalls. He also gets left overnight in a Laundromat when Lisa and her mom go to do laundry. He is finally reunited with Lisa, and the adventures continue with each subsequent book.


Corduroy had been sent to me and Misty for an adventure... but Misty was no longer here, so I decided to take Corduroy on a trip to Wales with me.

I shall document his adventure here.

We left work (Romford) in the early evening of Friday. I feel compelled to tell you I hate travel, and compelled to tell you that in choosing my ticket based on price alone, I fail to notice just how much travelling it would involve. Can you spell irony I.R.O.N.Y?

I had a ticket from Waterloo to Swansea. So to cut a rather long story slightly shorter I'll just tell you that the circle line was packed, and the signals failed, and I was glad to have given myself an extra hour to get to Waterloo. I less than glad about arriving in Swansea at Midnight, but that's the price you pay for being a cheapskate. I'd also like to point out that the train service between Cardiff and Swansea was a REQUEST service. Yes. I was shocked too.

Minxee met me at the station, and Mark was outside with Mavis the "Tranny Mini." As modes of transport go, it was favourable to the train by virtue of being private, and because it is a sexy purple colour. It was a tad noisier than the train, but it was a close run event.

After a quick cup of tea (the British Empire ran on cups of tea don't you know?) and a "bacon butty" the sofa bed was assembled and the land of nod welcomed me.

Saturday morning was brought to me by "The Mutt" Clyde. He had decided that I'd had enough sleep and had jumped me. It was not that early so I suppose he had a point. After another "bacon butty" and a couple cups of tea we was ready to face the world. OR... I was ready to face the Welsh (just joking Mark!)

Now you should know my mum was born in Swansea, and I have a lot of family there. It's also a strange fact that I've never managed to go there before. Illness and bad timing have kept me from the two biggest family functions there. My mum had given me a list of places to go see, most based on memories from her youth.

I had also explained to Mark and Minxee about Corduroy (although I had impromptually named him George) and his quest to have an adventure, and I had purchased a disposable camera to have some photographic evidence of the whole thing. This amused them slightly, but fair play to them, they were more than willing to show George, er, Corduroy, a "Good Time™"

First off we went back to Swansea station, or as mark put it, the "Arse end of Swansea." There was method to our madness, we visited the "Sheep Shop." You have to give the Welsh credit for their sense of humour! This was an art's and craft store that sold a LOT of sheep related items. I purchased a couple, one for Misty, one for the bedroom. I'll let your sick minds run with that for a while.

Next was the Mumbles Pier (a few picture opportunities here), followed very shortly after by the Mumbles lighthouse (where knowing what the tide is doing matters a great deal), and then the arcade. George (the mystery 4th player) managed to beat Minxee at skittles, but don't tell her I told you so.
A trip to see the Lifeboat (Ethel Ann Measures - thanks Minxee) was hampered slightly by it being launched and moored out to sea.

After the excitement of the sea we visited Joe's Ice-cream Parlour. Excuse me while I drool in rememberence of Joe's ice-cream. George/Corduroy was on a diet and didn't partake.

A trip to "Oyster Mouth" Castle followed, I was reliably informed that "Oyster Mouth" was the correct name for Mumbles, but has faded into non use.

From there we travelled to the last piece of "common" land left in the UK (correct me if I'm wrong) where "Arthur's Brick" stands. Legend has it that this was the stone that King Arthur (of the Britons) pulled Excalabur from, which caused the stone split in two. Legend aside, it was an impressive lump of rock balanced on several smaller rocks. There is exactly zero chance that this massive lump of rock happened to sit on these other smaller lumps of rock by pure chance.

After that particular windswept adventure home (via Marks Dads) was the welcome destination. After all the excitement George/Corduroy was totally knackered and spent the rest of the weekend in my pocket.

It was at this point I got to meet my namesake, the 3rd member of the "Man's House."

Mark proceeded to rustle up one of the meanest curries it's been my pleasure to suffer (seriously, it was fantastic!). J (Jay?) was still a little rough from the night before and didn't quite master the curry. He did turn a fetching shade of uncomfortable.

Saturday night Minxee and I went out to catch up on months of gossip. After being chucked out of a (rather nice) pub we returned to the "Man's House" to watch some dubious quality late night TV and play with the minds of some drunk txt-ers. For a fuller story see her journal.

Sunday morning the mutt decided I should get up by biting my hands through the duvet. He also stuck his nose in my face and licked me. As alarm clocks go he is most effective.

Sunday was a lazy day. I was convinced a bath was in order, perhaps I had started to smell or something?

After trying bravely to get Minxee to actually sit down to watch a whole film (can you spell 5 second attention span?) Mark spread a smaller than ordered chicken expertly between the four of us. Top marks to the cooks (Minxee was shoo chef), it was enough to feed a small army, and tasty as can be.

The original plan to find a quiet pub was changed at the final hour, and more wine (I'd already polished off a bottle) was purchased and a night in front of the news was had. Apart from the bad news, Minxee and I caught up on yet more gossip so all was not lost. Mark and J (Jay?) hid upstairs playing DAoC, which looks like a very interesting game, but I can see me getting very addicted and loosing my future wife... so maybe I'll pass for now.

Monday I was rough. I think the second bottle of wine must have been bad or something. It can't have possibly been the quantity of wine I'd drunk.

At this point I need to tell you about the "Big Apple." I have already mentioned my mum was born in Swansea, but what I haven't mentioned was her excited insistence I go visit the "Big Apple." "It's a shop in the shape of an apple," she told me. Imagine that for a moment. A shop in the shape of an apple. You have that image firmly in your mind?

I had asked Mark if I could see the big apple... after explaining it was a shop in the shape of an apple he said "oh the *apple*?" I had wondered if it had been demolished or something, but he assured me (with a half amused smile) that it was still there. On Saturday we had driven past it. I hadn't noticed, and I was slightly amazed when on Saturday night he's said so. How could I not notice the "Big Apple?"

So, on Monday, before the trip to the station for my journey back home, I was taken to see the "Big Apple".

...

Do you still have that image? Big Apple... Shop in the shape of an apple ... those images?

The apple (it doesn't deserve a capital) was about 6 foot in all directions. It was a kiosk for selling ice-cream and slush puppies to the tourists in the summer. It was rusting and quite an unimpressive sight. I can now understand Mark's bemused look when I was asking so desperately to see it.

To make up for the disappointment we went back to Joe's for more ice-cream. That is the other reason I will return to Swansea!

The journey home was a nightmare that involved the London Underground at the peak of rush hour. Did I mention how much I hate travelling?

I hope I haven't left too much out, it was a busy weekend. It was also a very enjoyable weekend, and I'd just like to say; thank you Minxee and Mark for having me - as soon as I'm sorted here the invitation is returned.

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Current Mood: drunk drunk
Current Music: Shannon - Let The Music Play

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Comments
dissolved_girl From: dissolved_girl Date: March 26th, 2003 04:31 am (UTC) (Link)
hehehe ethel ann measures.... name of the life boat apparently :P
Glad you had a *groovy fantastic* weekend hun we certainly did :D
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